DEAR DADDY

Today I am tasked with the very mammoth responsibility of writing the second hardest speech YET!

I have stalled and literally ignored this moment for many months now and finally the day is here. Oh my Goodness, how will I get through this?

Actually this is the hardest speech I have ever had to write because unlike last year I was completely zoned out; unaware of what was going on. I was in a space where nothing was real to me. Seeing him laying lifeless on the bed wasnt real, seeing him in the coffin was just a bad dream and finally, lowering that coffin six feet into the earth........ that was real! and today.... exactly 12 months later, this is as real as it gets.
I cannot for a second understand how time has gone by so fast. Oh well, only God alone can explain this but some things are left unexplained and i don't mind.

I wish I could live In October 2012, ALL MY LIFE! because that way he would still be here! Here forever! I wish I could hide him away from the Grim Reaper (because that's who steals kills and destroys)  and mostly I wish I knew Last year today that I would lose him! Maybe I would have done some things different!

Today he dies again! I just cant take it. This time I know its true.. how can I hold back tears when all I feel is pain? I have the worst headache from suppressing these tears.... I feel like they just wont stop if I let them. I promise, the moment any one mentions your name, my eyes pour... I am like a balloon waiting to just pop. I want to say its okay, you lived your life and it was time for you to go but to me, you are gone too soon.... I have to actively force my brain to ignore the fact that you are not here. But don't worry so much about me, I am not always like this, its just that TODAY marks exactly one year since you answered the bright light call. I can still see your face asking me to let you go. Your body language saying you are safe in God's hands...your eyes that couldn't stop staring at me.. the exact thing i was doing when you were pronounced dead.. wow, you are greatly missed.

On the 9th we are holding some sort of memorial for you - church service and all, im sure you would storm out of your room and ask everyone to go home because you are safe.... well, either that or you would be happy to see us all gather. I cant promise I wont cry (seeing as thats what I do best these days) but I promise to give the best speech I have ever written (well, when I start to write it).

Daddy, you meant the world to me.. first God then you.. even mum couldn't fight this order... lol, she just knew I was your girl. But now I am her girl. She is so patient with me.. with all of us. She is doing so well in taking care of the house, just like you groomed her to, because we all know you were King!!

I am yet to start drafting my tribute to you and when I do, it will describe what a great man you were, an amazing leader, a good friend and the best father one can ever have. You gave me your ALL. You were ever so present- taught me how to walk and eventually how to drive and till today, I drive like a man (well, between that and a bus driver.lol) because you taught me to be independent and never be a push over. I live to make you proud.

As hard as some days are, I thank the good Lord for your marvellous time here on earth with us. We are so blessed to have been picked to spend the bulk of your earthly time with us. I couldnt have asked for a better mentor. The way you prayed and said "God willing" before everything you wanted to do, I see why you always sought God's permission.

I won't pre-empty my whole speech here so il leave it at "Enjoy Heaven" BIG G!! (and yes, all of Buff's friends still call you that, #nutcases!)

I always say that if my cellphone could reach Heaven, your line would forever be engaged!

I MISS YOU Daddy!

WOE IS ME!!

I am too tall
I am too short
My hair is too soft
Mine is too Hard
My Legs are too big
Mine are too skinny
I am too fat
I am too skinny
I eat like a pig
I dont eat at all
You are beautiful - No im not, s/he is
My Stomach has a stomach of its own
My stretch marks - My Scars
My fingers are too long - Mine are too short
My teeth are too stained - My teeth are a maze
My gap is too wide - I wish i had a gap
My eyes are too big - Mine are too small
My ears are too small
My Nose is too wide
My Butt is too big - mine is too small
My eyebrows dont grow as desired - No really, they dont!
My skin is too bright - My skin is too dark
I hate my boobs
I love your body
I wish i had those arms
I wish my hair was as long as *insert*
I wish I was HER!!!!!
My legs are too hairy - Mine have no hair at all
My head is too big
I wish i had a 6pack
I need steroids

 Oh man! Oh man!!I bet you EVERYONE that reads this will tick at the least 5things they have said on that list!! me inclusive!
I am certain God sheds tears everyday when he listens to us talk to ourselves or each other like this!
it seems as though whats trending is Self-bashing! Many will agree with me that 'Thank you' just isnt cool enough as a response anymore...if someone walks up to you with a compliment, the first thing is to counter their compliment - I am such a culprit, I dont receive very well so I will forever find something good on you and compliment that as opposed to soaking in your compliment towards me.. here is a couple of scenarios:

1. You: you look so good
     Me: No, you do.. and your hair is amazing!

2. Another You: I like your Dress
    Me Again: This old thing, yours though.....

That is me a lot of the time, I cant stand compliments - I want them but they freak me out! I dont get it. But that's most of us. You think you receive compliments well but you really dont. Its either you soak it in too much (conceited) or you don't soak it in at all (weirdly insecure).
Right now you may think you are not insecure because you hit the gym one too many times, you have the perfect butt, your hair is amazing but i bet you something about you (according to you) is amiss. This is just sad!



To be honest, all our complaints are pretty much things we can change, and those we cant, we embrace because thats what makes YOU! ME!! Unique and wonderfully crafted!! like your HEIGHT!!! (Note to Self!lol)..

Solutions to your Problems are as follows:

I am too tall -
....... you'd make an awesome Model
I am too short -
........Wear heels if that's what you need but your height is perfect
My hair is too soft -
 .......research on how to get it a little more textured but no one hates u because of that
Mine is too Hard -
 .........moisturize, condition, steam.....
My Legs are too big - Mine are too skinny.......and I bet they are beautiful
I am too fat - 
........THE FAVORITE!! you know the solution is for you to put that chocolate bar down and start eating healthier, join a gym! don't be lazy!! its all achievable
 I am too skinny -
 ........Your metabolism is probably high meaning you burn what you eat quick, if you want to gain some weight, eat regularly and a lot of proteins I think.
I eat like a pig - I don't eat at all - 
..............Food is meant to keep you going not comfort you when depressed. its not your friend like that. and If you don't eat, how do you expect to survive?
You are beautiful - No im not, she is!! -
 ..............Yes she is, and so are YOU!
My Stomach has a stomach of its own -
 ..................... hahaha, now that's just funny #Exercise #Gym #Bootcamp #HealthyEating
My stretch marks - My Scars - 
..........................Scars are beautiful, they form this mini identity of you. Stretch marks however can be dealt with - try bio-oil. and some scars can fade too.
My fingers are too long - Mine are too short - 
...........and God meant for them to look just like that!
My teeth are too stained - My teeth are a maze -
.................Stained teeth can be whitened! If they are a Maze though, TRUST ME, someone is falling in love with that!
I wish i had a gap between my teeth - My gap is too wide -
 .......................its genetic, its part of you.. but if it is ridiculously side, braces can fix that however, its still beautiful. You wish you had a gap. That's a tough one, Black tape maybe!!
My eyes are too big - Mine are too small -
 .................Too big?? i say beautiful! Too small?? (story of my life) I say exotic!
My ears are too small -
...........But do you hear perfect?? (if the answer is yes then we have no problem)
My Nose is too wide -
 ...............Welcome, You are an African!
My Butt is too big - mine is too small-
 ..............Too Big?? you can either work out to get it trim or embrace your curves! Too small??? Squats work wonders!
My eyebrows dont grow as desired - No really, they dont! -
 ..........Fake them and fake them good!!
My skin is too bright - My skin is too dark - 
Too Bright? Tan, atleast its temporal! Too Dark??? I cant say Bleach because Dark is beautiful but its your choice entirely.
I hate my boobs -
 ..................With the right bra though.......
I love your body - 
..................THANK YOU!! #NuffSaid
I wish i had those arms -
 .......................whats wrong with yours? (dont think i want to hear the response to that!) well, work them out, they will be nice and toned
I wish my hair was as long as *insert* - 
..............Take great care and begin to grow it!
I wish I was HER!!!!! - 
..............................No you dont! you are YOU because God wants it this way! you are just having a bad day (month! year!)
My legs are too hairy - Mine have no hair at all -
......Too hairy?? shave! No hair..... do you need it?
My head is too big - 
............and your brain is comfortable so don't worry about it.
I wish i had a 6pack - 
............well man! Gym! Bootcamp! Healthy Eating!
I need steroids -
...................No you dont!! Hardwork can do for you what Steroids wont keep!!

According to God though we are so BEAUTIFULLY made! We are COMPLETE! WHOLE in every way manner and form. Everything is in its place. Every little hair, every dimple, every freckle is just right!! The day You align your thinking to that of God's, Oh My! you will be unstoppable! because it is at that point that you realise YOU are the master of your fate - what you become tomorrow is entirely upto what you do today and that's entirely up to YOU now!! Be the Change you want to see!!! Fortunately and Unfortunately YOU have the Power and if you don't use it, well, hence the unfortunately part!!

So next time, before you put to shame what God has done, count YOUR BLESSINGS ONE BY ONE and see what the Lord has done for YOU!!!

This article is not about all the suffering people in the world and counting yourself lucky, its just about a little self appreciation!!! No one will see you for you until you begin to show yourself! Find your true self and sell that to the world!!

Compliment Someone Today! Love yourself Today!! and Most Importantly THANK GOD for everything, Great and Small!

#Bless
 

HEALTHY LIFESTYLE!

PROGRESS!

Deciding to live a healthy lifestyle goes beyond looks for me, I mean, its a very good motivator but what are good looks without substance?? Wait..... REWIND... Looking Good is an AWESOME motivator!! But that's not what its all about. we are all such unique individuals and just like our looks, what drives us also differs..

I tell you this, your confidence has everything to do with what you look like today - if you are happy (whatever size) confidence will reflect and if not (whatever size again) the lack thereof will reflect as well.. (but that's another blog post)

Here is MY List (in no particular order) of My Motivations for this healthy lifestyle I have embarked on, (and if looks happen to top the list, Dont judge!!lol)

1. OUTWARD APPEAL

I would (in all honesty) much rather be at 4.. however, I dont know if my genes will take me that far so I will settle for 3 .. (with the facial expression of 2!lol )

We all need to remember though, that the SCALE really does not have the final say if your goal is fat-loss.. I say this because during your workout, you WILL gain muscle and lose fat but its not a guarantee that you will weigh a lot less.. muscle is more dense than fat (it takes up less space) so think of it this way, you lose the fat (and look great outward) and gain muscle which is awesome because it speeds up your metabolism (rate at which you burn calories) and build curves. I find that many people on a weight-loss program would rather worship the scale than concentrate on the actual weight being lost and evidenced through the mirror and the loose fitting clothes.

Fat Versus Muscle

As a kid, I was much (much much) heavier than I am today, but I guess I cant dwell much on that because most of my adult life, I really have been this size that I am today.. I am at a comfortable size and weight which only bothers me when clothes I really want donot fit - either too small or too big.. this has forced me to either belt everything at the waist or shop at the kiddies in some extreme cases (which I must say has the cutest Tees).. Dont get me wrong, I am no-where near numero Uno (#1) in the picture above and I donot secretely have desires to get there.

3. HEALTHY LIFESTYLE

  This is a Lifestyle, not a diet or a Phase! "LIFESTYLE" Period!!

4. HEALTH & FITNESS

If it is up for grabs, Il take it ALL.. from the New Energy Levels, the Great Abs, Strength to Endurance.
Physical fitness is generally achieved through correct nutrition (which I am constantly improving at), exercise ( join boot camp, a gym or work out with a friend for motivation), hygiene (true story) and rest ( yes, leisure, human relaxation and much needed sleep - such a constant battle for me but its the most important and I know this).
I am much leaner than when I started my journey obviously because I have seriously put in a lot of work - is it starting to show yet? I mean, it has been more than 12weeks, it better show!!! 

PERSONAL BENEFITS

Where do I start? the benefits of regular exercise are endless:-

• Strengthen your bones and muscles - True story!
• Improve your mental health and mood - Exercise is the single best thing you can do for your brain in terms of mood, memory, and learning, this is proven by medical practitioners too... I kid you not! something about a hormone. hehe
• Improve your ability to do daily activities- I honestly have more endurance now and I am praying to get better every week.
• Increase your chances of living longer - and then a genius tells me I might die by a speeding car which totally has nothing to do with health... but maybe if I am fit, I might see it coming my way and run a little faster off of the road than I would have 12weeks ago! just maybe!

Bottom Line for me is that I want to be able to still work hard and still have a lot of energy left over. I want to be healthy enough to see my kids and theirs, I guess the longevity of life has very little to do with me being able to control that - but it would sure be nice to be able to carry that cross with my new found energy levels and mental health.

Be the Change you want to see right!! Start Now!

As usual, check out our trainer:

#TeamLiveFit >> follow link below;

http://www.facebook.com/livefitzambia?ref=stream&hc_location=timeline

Twitter: @TheRealMuz
Instagram @TheRealMuz

KUTOWA DESIGNS - YATATU COLLECTION LOOK-BOOK!

Finally I have some time to review the Kutowa Launch from the time I wrote about attending the show.
Towani as usual attracted a vast variety of spectators, from journalists to officials in the arts Ministry to ordinary fashion lovers. 


I absolutely enjoyed my time there. Apart from the lovely snacks and wine (which I don't drink but people did not complain about) I met a lot of lovely acquaintances and friends. Towani as usual did not disappoint. The last collection - black and white was particularly my favorite. Classy with lace and jackets that switch from inside out. Amazing work as usual.


Pictures below courtesy of my lovely friend, radio presenter, not-so-amateur photographer (clearly by the images below), extraordinaire really *drumroll please* Luciano a.k.a Luchi. He is such an amazing person, friend, so intelligent and full of everything LIFE! I cant thank him enough for letting me use his images. Enough talk (type), Enjoy!

The pictures below courtesy of Nambeye, amazing young photographer and journalist. She did justice!

 What I wore:

Without much of a thought I wore the easiest thing my closet could put together. Chitenge skater shirt with matching Chitenge details on my shoes and the rest was black... trust me, black works all the time and I finished it off with this gorgeous drop beaded ear-piece, a gift from an amazing accessories designer from Botswana, Boitshoko Kebakile (Like her FB Page House of Divinity )

picture credit: Nambeye <3

Lessons Learnt

Having attended a number of Zambian fashion shows, there are a lot of things I have picked up and usually I make mental notes but how do we grow if everyone makes a mental note without actually telling anyone.... right? So I have decided to finally put my lessons (general observations) learnt into some form of words:

• Designers to Collabo with Stylists

Stylists could be Hair stylist, makeup artist and fashion stylist
A Fashion Stylist is someone who does not particularly design outfits but has an amazing eye and puts together a particular look or theme for the specific project e.g., a fashion show / launch, photo-shoots..the works.
A Fashion Designer on the other hand is involved in the process of creating garments either by sketching them or actually putting the fabric together by sewing.
A fashion designer is NOT always a great fashion stylist and as we know, to make a successful show, delegation is key. However, I have witnessed some amazing Designers that are blessed with amazing Styling genes too and clearly they do not need any help from external stylists.
I guess what im trying to say is, designers must consider and make certain that all pieces come together so beautifully that a story is told, because that is paramount to the outcome. Which point leads me to the next;

• A careful selection of Foot-wear 

I know for a fact after working behind-the-scenes of fashion shows often that models are tasked to bring their own footwear to pair with their outfits. And some are lucky enough to have great shoes where as others... uhmmm, yeah... so that right there is a problem. Some designers are able to provide foot wear and  others may not be able to - so its really quite tough - however, some stores maybe willing to provide foot wear for advertisements but the trend in Zambia really is that no store will lend you shoes unless the walk way is paved with plastic or something of that sort. BUT... this problem can be tackled by a stylist from the Designer's team looking carefully at what the models bring and consider options.

• Presenters/ MCz Outfits - Male or Female

This in my books is a Must!! its such an add-on to your advertising. I have noticed that most Mcz are also tasked to bring their own clothes but come on! its a fashion show, have them wear your Brand. I am assuming the Presenter would have been thought through way before the event, its a great chance to style them and have them change outfits during the breaks (or not) however, I know it makes the show exciting and Designers need to be mindful that the Presenter will be on the stage longer than any of their models so utilize that as a tool. 

•  Music Selection

Who should be incharge of picking the music the models walk to? Who selects the music that is played during breaks? Should music be carefully selected to match the theme of the show?
All these are just some of the questions I have as I sit there watching the models strut their thing and of course during those necessary intermissions.

Those are just some of my general observations from different fashion shows I have attended. Kuddos to all the designers that ace their shows - hard-work does pay off!

Fashion enthusiasts, what are your observes? lets help improve the Zambian fashion scene if we are to be taken seriously globally.

#Bless

 

BOOTCAMP: August Memorabilia!!

SPECIAL EDITION!

AUGUST was such a great month! I achieved most of what (in my head) I set out to do.... I got stronger, faster and (still working on) leaner.. Lost some FAT....(there is a difference between fat and mass bytheway) and now looking to get toned and owning my new shape (when it comes). Not only that, I was a trainer (yes, TRAINER) for a few sessions as our usual trainer took a small break - what an experience! But That's AUGUST!!!! and I sense my September will be twice as awesome. I'm ready for it!


LiveFit has had a promotion running for the whole lot of August which has received such an amazing response from people everywhere. We had such great people coming through, all of different fitness levels... 

The Promotion is NOT over, you still get a FREE session the first time you come so if you haven't been, make a date with LIVEFIT on their page and register for your session.

Memorabilia from AUGUST!!!

All photos taken from our amateur phone cameras.  September will be better! lol

with fellow Stylist Sarah of Sarchu's Vintage House

with our trainer >> @therealMuz

Chiko a yoga fitness junkie

 

An appearance by the song-bird Kanji (red vest) @KanjiReturnz follow her on twitter - her new music is FIRE!

Clearly we have had more fun taking pictures post Exercise.

I echo that August has been such a brilliant month fitness wise for me. If you are still trying to make up your mind about living a healthy lifestyle, well, you really honestly cant be convinced any further..... but wait, our trainer's transformation might just inspire you (Near future blog post), and if that doesn't, I dont know what will. Sweets are bad!!! End Story! lol.

Thank you to everyone that has Come for the Exercise and those that have Come ans STAYED!!  Good Bye August and all your wonderful Memories!! See you in September!! #TeamWorkMakesTheDreamWork!!

#Bless

As always  Check out Our trainer>> #TeamLiveFit >> follow link below;

http://www.facebook.com/livefitzambia?ref=stream&hc_location=timeline

twitter: @TheRealMuz
instagram @TheRealMuz

I NEED HELP!!!

(A piece from 23rd August 2013)

Where does your help come from??

Sometimes I am so hard-headed. Its My way or the Highway!! I forget to say my 'Please' and 'Thank Yous' and 'Excuse Me' and to assure someone that they are 'Welcome.' I forget to do good to others, to remain humble. Surely this would disappoint my Father for he taught me better than this. But i simply ........forget. I become unapproachable, invincible and irreplaceable Through Mine Eyez! The constant battle between the my Flesh and the Spirit! *Sigh*



I have to be honest here, I am culprit of 'self-solutions'. The one place that started the problem i.e., my self is where I turn when angry. It seems to make sense then! But when God feels like He has tried Left - Right and Center to grab my attention, something must surely give!!!

I have learnt today that it is in my quietest moments that I will hear from the Lord most. Even common knowledge has it that amidst all the noise and turbulence you can hardly hear anything, let alone something that is as calming and peaceful as the Lord's voice. The sound of my own voice and thoughts are distraction enough!

I stumbled upon Kari Jobe - Aww what a blessing her cute voice has been to my heart. Bless the path that led me to this video.. BE STILL!!!

Sometimes, its not smart words or the right attitude that you need, it may just be a tiny voice of reassurance - that the Lord has got you! I mean, it might not be the same for us all, but it works for me so beautifully!

I have had to BE STILL!! to trust only in Him, because really and truly, He has ALL the answers.





In those times that I seek inspiration and or some sort of solution, I know now to BE STILL - and wait on the Lord....... there is no harm in waiting for the BEST solution!!

I do not want to be enslaved by my Flesh anymore, by desires that seek to only benefit me, by mediocre and petty thoughts, by lack of courtesy, it may all seem like small deeds but its only when they begin to take over that you realise you need HELP!!!

BE STILL My Soul!

BOOT CAMP: Live Fit Health and Fitness!! #GetFitCampaign

BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT!!

I can't begin to explain the amount of energy I have gained since joining Boot Camp. The gym equipment would have never done this for me, clearly because I am too lazy to push myself. I keep saying, if you are anything like me, Boot Camp should be something you look forward to. The trainer to push you and other members for encouragement!


At Boot camp we have had to do everything, I mean EVERYTHING exercise related, from work-outs I can not pronounce to some I did not even know existed.

What Keeps me going?

Well, apart from my energy levels moving from a minimum of 3 on a chart or 1-10 to 5.. trust me, 5 may seem like a small number, but it is not for me, I know I am doing something right and the BODY ACHES after workout drastically taking a step back.... Ahh, why must I stop if its working???? its a Lifestyle!

They say it takes about 4weeks for you to Notice the Change yourself and its safe to say I am better than I started.. 8 weeks for your family/friends to Notice it (happened too) and 12 weeks for the whole world to Notice (gulp!! Im on that!lol).


Recently, my goals have had to change from merely needing more energy for my various life activities to now seriously desiring a FIT body!! it not vain at all! (*smiles and waves*)

The sessions are getting more intense and as much as I hate to say this.....FUN, and yes, some days are horrible (mostly because I forgot to eat for energy) but that just makes me want to be better at the next Session. To be honest, SUICIDES have to be the worst form of exercise and to keep going back and forth for 15 minutes does not make it fun, however sprinting and running has taught me alot of ENDURANCE and FOCUS! Two very important values I can use in my daily life. And the art of NEVER GIVING UP is priceless!


So if you are still thinking about joining Live Fit Boot Camp, well, come for the FREE session, see how you like it and Join thereafter... or not, its up to you really, and what works for you. I know you will have Zero regrets though!

Like anything else on this earth (that doesn't fall from the sky like Manna) DONT just WISH for it! WORK for it!



As usual: Check out Our trainer>> #TeamLiveFit >> follow link below;

http://www.facebook.com/livefitzambia?ref=stream&hc_location=timeline

twitter: @TheRealMuz
instagram @TheRealMuz